Today I was 6dp6dt.
I say ‘was’, because I can now say Today I am pregnant.
A couple of days after transfer, my friend, E, commented on how much bigger my boobs were. Right?? I acknowledged. The next day DH returned from a two-day business trip and I flashed him. What do you think? His response was a drawn out Oh my Gaaad! He agreed there was a heaviness and a puffiness to my breasts.
I thought I’d *maybe* gone up a cup size, so I measured them this morning. I was a large 34B… and now I am a 34D. I’ve gone up almost two cup sizes in four days. I feel like I’m wearing a Wonderbra. No wonder [bra]!
And then there was the frequent hunger — anyone who knows me knows, although I have a healthy appetite I am never hungry first thing, but I’ve been starving at breakfast the past few days.
Progesterone may explain the cramping, but not the stretching, tugging feelings in my uterus. Progesterone could explain the breast tenderness I’ve had, but not the growth spurt. And it is more inclined to make someone nauseated than ravenous.
My friend, L (almost full-term with her IVF baby — yay!), suggested I wait until Wednesday to Pee On A Stick (POAS). It helps break the waiting game into manageable chunks of time, she explained. I was totally on board — until this evening.
I’d just Skyped my best friend, A, and drank two cups of rooibos Earl Grey tea. By the time I hung up, I was desperate to pee. I emptied my bladder and settled down on my bed with my iPad and a third cup of tea, brought to me by DH. He said You have a big smile on your face like you know you’re pregnant! I said I thought I was and that I was this close to doing a pregnancy test. He said, Let’s do it! and I said, Okay!
I reasoned to myself that a negative would be okay. It’s still early. I just peed 20 minutes ago. My pee was clear then and it would be clear again. If it did contain hCG, it might not contain enough to trigger a pregnancy test. There’s always tomorrow. I held my FRER in a cup and within 15 seconds a second line appeared.
I’m pregnant. The words sounded happier than they did the first time I ever spoke them, but less surprised. DH looked so happy and relieved, but kept asking Are you sure? That second line isn’t as dark as that other line. What IS that other line? I explained to him that a second line is a positive, no matter how faint. I had to show him photos online to prove it to him.
I guess I am 3w5d. I’ll be taking this pregnancy one day at a time. My beta is on Monday, and I hope it’s a good, strong number. Then there’s the first ultrasound where we will hopefully see at least one heartbeat. The final hurdle, perhaps the point at which I can relax a little, will be passing 8w3d, and passing an ultrasound with flying colours at my OB’s clinic. I am enjoying every moment so far that I can say I’m pregnant. I am so grateful to Nellie. NELLIE, I LOVE YOU!!!!!
A year ago today, I took my first dose of Misoprostol — Four little tablets that I pushed towards my cervix to ripen it and start the process my body couldn’t. If you had told me the next time I would be pregnant — for real — would be exactly a year later, I would have lain down in despair and never gotten up. A year later, I am wiser. I know a BFP doesn’t guarantee a baby. I know a BFP can be a huge grief trigger for women in the ALI community. This evening, I am aware of all these things, but I am ecstatic, nervous, and, above all, so very grateful to be able to say that today I am pregnant.
oh, yay!!! we’ve only just “met”, but i already found myself wishing this for you and you DH. it was a lovely surprise to come to your blog and find such a beautiful, hope-filled photo. here’s to sticky, healthy beans and nine easy months. felicitations!
We may have only just met, but I feel like I know you already! Thank you so much for feeling so joyful for us! I hope your wishes come true for me, for you, for all of us xoxoxoxo
My bet- twins!
Ha! Well, you’ll find out soon enough :)
This is awesome! I don’t think it’s a coincidence at all that TODAY is the day you found out. With this pregnancy I found out on the same weekend of my first angel due date. No coincidence. I’m so happy for you. Breathe and take it one day at a time. So much easier to say than to do.
Thanks, Heidi! So many anniversaries, so many milestones, so many coincidences. I’m glad you have found synchronicity between your pregnancies comforting. I know I do. It helps take things one day at a time, that’s for sure xo
Gorgeous face, gorgeous post, now let’s see those knockers ;)
I texted you :)
Congratulations! I am so excited for you. I knew this was going to work for you :)
Thank you so much! I had a good feeling too, let’s hope it stays this way! xx
Huge Congratulations Lauren! Enjoy every moment of this special time – you so deserve every bit of happiness that comes your way xxxxx
Thanks, Roses! I am enjoying every moment. It already feels magical, and a privilege. I feel fortunate. xo
Yay!! I’m so happy for you and your husband! You deserve this
Thanks, chica — you do too!
Fantastic! I know I already said it, but congratulations! That is about how mine looked at 12 dpIUI with my one and only successful pregnancy. I’m going to take that as a good sign. So very thrilled for you, and I can’t wait to share the next 9 months with you! :)
A lovely omen! May I be so lucky to have a daughter as cute as the Wee Woman. Thank you for being a part of the journey, friend xoxo
Aw honey you look so beautiful. Your eyes are so calm! Buckets of love to you all xxx
You’re sweet <3 Those are the eyes of someone very happy indeed! So much love to you guys too xoxo
Brilliant love. Congratulations to you and the hubs! Snuggle in little embabies – both of you stay nice and comfy for the next nine months or so!!! :)
Thank you, Firefly! It feels good to have your wishes. Thanks for being a part of the journey xo