Hi! I’m Lauren—a writer, editor, graphic designer, and reproductive warrior. And I’m a mama thanks to my fabulous egg donor.
A Brief Summary of My Journey to Parenthood
In a six-month period in 2013, I suffered three devastating diagnoses, each more unlikely than the last: first, a miscarriage (1 in 4); then, infertility (1 in 8); and then learning genetic children would not be possible, due to a chromosomal disorder (so rare there are only 50 families known worldwide who have it).
Taking my DNA out the equation was the only way I would become a mother. We considered adoption, but chose egg donation because we wanted more than one child. In early 2014, we did our first DEIVF cycle and transferred two fresh embryos, one male and one female, on February 26th. After a high-risk pregnancy, we welcomed our daughter, V, in October via planned caesarean (with unexpected complications).
When the time came to add to our family, we had eight PGS-tested embryos on ice. We had five failed FET cycles before getting lucky on our sixth try. On February 26, 2018—exactly four years to the day that we transferred the the embryo that became our daughter—we transferred two embryos, a boy and a girl, and got pregnant. Our twins, A and Z, were born full term in October, also via planned caesarean—thankfully, with no surprises this time!
→ For the full account of my journey to motherhood, read My Reproductive Story.
Openness & HONESTY
I’m completely open about how my family came to be. When it comes to donor conception, I believe in full transparency, and wish more people—and clinics—were like-minded. Many of my later blog posts are about how I talk to my children and other people about egg donation. Here’s a handy list if you’d like to read about conversations I have with my kiddos at various ages, as well as with friends & family, and how to navigate those damn questions from strangers ;)
Writing and Editing About Egg Donation
I had the privilege of content-editing Let’s Talk About Egg Donation, the only book written by two moms via egg donation, for anyone at any stage of egg/embryo donation family-building.
Recently, I’ve been sharing the idea that having a baby cures childlessness—not infertility. I know firsthand that reproductive trauma doesn’t go away just because you have a child. Infertility PTSD is real. Pregnancy loss PTSD is real. Reproductive PTSD is real.
I publish an e-newsletter that is a love letter to parents and parents-in-waiting: Lauren X Words is a curated selection of words from me and others about donor conception, reproductive trauma, reproductive rights, and anti-racism at the intersection of parenting. This is my way of trying to give back to the broader loss/infertility community. You can sign up for the newsletter here (I won’t share your info and you can unsubscribe any time).
Talking (More!) About Egg Donation
I founded and co-admin a Facebook group for people parenting after reproductive trauma, Rainbows & Unicorns—so-called because a while back I reasoned that if a baby born after a pregnancy loss is a ‘rainbow’, then a baby born after infertility must be a ‘unicorn’! Contact me if you’d like to join.
when I’m not writing/talking/designing…
…you’ll find me eating something delicious, listening to music, or digging my toes in the sand at one of San Diego’s beaches. Mostly, though, my days are spent chasing after my three rainbow unicorns—the most wondrous little creatures my heart has ever known.
Feel free to connect with me on Instagram: