When I was a kid I really enjoyed the movie Flight of the Navigator. In case you’re not familiar with it, a friendly alien kidnaps a boy, but when he returns him to Earth it’s eight years later. I’ve thought about 8-year periods ever since. What will I be doing in 8 years’ time? I ponder at random moments. I…
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Protected: Week In Review
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To TTC or not to TTC, that is the question…
I long more than anything to be a mother. Truthfully, it’s the only thing I ever wanted to be, growing up. All other career fantasies were secondary to the idea of being a mom. Maybe it’s because my childhood wasn’t the most stable? (Whatever, it certainly explains why I had such a hard time choosing a career until a couple…
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Square One
Last week’s period lasted 4 days. It was lighter than usual, as though I skipped the first two days of heavy flow, so it probably wasn’t a true menstrual period. But it was the first real sign that slowly, slowly, my body is returning to its pre-pregnancy state. Then, on Monday, I found out that my TSH levels fell into…
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The Salve that Heals the Wound
Last night, DH and I watched After the Wedding, a deeply moving Danish film that brought hot tears to my eyes. It felt pretty damn good to get so emotional over fiction for a change. Later in bed, still emotional, I started crying again and a scene from another movie popped into my head. Have you seen Fearless, with Jeff…
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Super Sweet & Sugar Bowls
It’s been a busy couple weeks. Between confronting fears, greeting Aunt Flo, and working on assembling my online portfolio to enhance my job prospects, I have been a little bit AWOL in the ALI blogosphere. In fact, I only just noticed that both the lovely Egg Timer and Ana from In My Garden Grow each nominated me for the Super…
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Moving Forward with Pain
Last week was one of the most difficult for me yet, but since confronting my fears of coming face to face with P-SIL last Friday and dealing with the subsequent wave of emotions, amazingly, life has got a little easier. I suspected that the thought of seeing P-SIL was more agonising in my imagination than in real life. It was…
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Are You There, God? It’s Me, Lauren…
Oh. My. God. Aunt Flo made her long-awaited appearance last night! Eighty-two days (that’s 11 weeks and 5 days) after my D&C, red splotches on the loo paper. It was, as one of our most belovéd Judy Blume heroines (and wannabe menstruation expert), Margaret, said when Aunt Flo finally showed up on her doorstep, “Not a lot–but enough.” I’m struck…
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Painful Phantom Period: Instinct or Paranoia?
It’s been almost 12 weeks since I had my D&C and my period still hasn’t returned. I’m getting quite worried now. The absence of my period would be one thing, but that combined with other symptoms is concerning me. Thought I would reach out to the pregnancy loss community to see if I can get some answers / reassurance ahead…
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Protected: Heal Thy Self / Healthy Self
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