I’ve been thinking about how to express the various stages of pregnancy joy, loss, and infertility grief I’ve passed / am passing through this year. There have been a few movie scenes which I keep coming back to — the obvious ones are the Mr. Stork scene in Dumbo, and the miscarriage scene in Up, … Read More about Video Project
Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About an HSG
Monday was my HSG. I’d been warned by countless people that this particular procedure hurt like… well, a ‘hopefulmother-fucker’. I’d heard horror stories of people screaming, describing it as the most painful procedure there is. Only a few people didn’t experience excruciating pain. With my high pain threshold, I thought I would be the exception. … Read More about Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About an HSG
OFT featured on DailyParent.com!
I’m delighted to announce that my article, Miscarriage: Ten Things Not to Say, and Ten Suggestions for What You Can Do to Help, has been re-posted on DailyParent.com! Check it out!
Total Eclipse of the Son
If I had ever imagined the possibility that one day I would be “over” my miscarriage, I would have expected that particular grief journey to end because of a new beginning–a new pregnancy, one that ends with a healthy baby, and onto the next chapter: Motherhood. Floundering in the depths of my grief, I was … Read More about Total Eclipse of the Son
Decisions
Held in the tranquility of our weekend away, DH and I reached the decision that, if we proceed with egg donation, we will use an anonymous donor instead of my sister. I don’t feel like going into a massive family history, but we concluded that it would be much easier to go with an anonymous … Read More about Decisions
Undue Date: October 5th 2013
Saturday October 5th: the day that was supposed to be the most exciting day of my life. A date that will forever be etched onto my soul. I awoke, peaceful. My new surroundings–crisp white sheets, rumpled by the night, in a minimalist hotel room with French doors overlooking the desert garden–momentarily distracted me. What’s today? … Read More about Undue Date: October 5th 2013
Liebster Award
And now for some light entertainment. The lovely Annie of Sweetest in the Gale has nommed me for a Liebster Award. Here goes: Eleven Random Facts About Me Eleven. I love prime numbers. I like to listen to music in the car on a prime number. That’s usually either 19 or 23. I used … Read More about Liebster Award
London, and What Happens Next
I just joined a support group for third party reproduction and had to introduce myself. Thought I’d kill two birds with one stone by re-posting an expanded version here. It’ll explain what’s going on to long-time readers, but also bring new readers up to speed. Sorry for the long post. I considered breaking it up … Read More about London, and What Happens Next
On Second Thought…
…my outburst the other night, truthful though it was, may have been premature. Incredibly, I’ve received many messages of support and understanding. Though I may have driven some away by my harsh words, I am more surprised by the number of women who have said I get it. I respect your decision. But I hope … Read More about On Second Thought…
Goodbye, Comrades
This post is probably my last. I’d always hoped OFT would have a happy ending, but that seems unlikely. At least, far from how I could ever have imagined. I can’t begin to explain the weary rage I feel. There is very little fight left in me. I’ve poured my broken heart and open soul … Read More about Goodbye, Comrades
