DEIVF Transfer

As I sit here typing this, it seems so amazing to me to know there are two little embryos inside me, hopefully burrowing their way into my endometrium. They’ve already burrowed into my heart. I will write more about what it feels like to be PUPO — knowing there are two embryos inside my body, knowing they did not come from my body — in another post. Today’s post is about the actual transfer.

♥

Wednesday February 26th 2014, exactly a year to the day of my first fateful ultrasound. The day began with the call from embryology telling us that all but one embie was normal and that we had a choice of gender. The other third of embryos had made it to good quality blastocyst and would be biopsied before being frozen. (As they did not qualify for fresh transfer, we do not need to put a rush on the genetic testing, so this handful of embryos were frozen before we get the results — any abnormal ones will be discarded.)

I put the phone down and noticed I was shaking. Happiness, relief, disbelief, awe, gratitude. A whole ball of embie emotions (embotions?) rolled into one. DH and I hugged each other. MIL had tears in her eyes and hugged us. We have so many healthy embryos — and possibly quite a few more to come — that the pressure to get knocked up the first cycle has been taken off. I can’t tell you how fortunate I feel. I think I know how lucky I am.

I Skyped my dad, currently in London, to share our good news. It was brief, as the morning flew by and we needed to leave. We allowed a little extra time to stop by my dentist’s office — I’d had my teeth cleaned Tuesday and forgot my night guard. My dentist and his wife (his assistant) are Indian and we have bonded over Indian cuisine in San Diego and having relatives in the UK. When she handed me my mouth guard, she pressed a bag of homegrown bay leaves into my hand, and held my face in her hands as she wished me good luck.

At the clinic, the two receptionists greeted me with big smiles and a welcome Today’s the big day!. Our usual junior nurse came into the reception on her break and wished us luck; then a nurse I’d never met before, J, showed to Exam Room 5 and gave us some consent forms — mainly that I consent to having 2 embryos transferred — and discharge instructions. She explained that B, the head of embryology, would be along momentarily.

DH and I went over the forms and signed them. I took the opportunity to snap a few photos of us and the room.

B entered a few minutes later. I was surprised by how charismatic he was — for some reason I expected a socially awkward type — and liked him immediately. To my delight, he handed us a page of photos of embryos — my tiny ones! You want to transfer one of each, right? he asked. Well, your best are Three and Four. Three is male, Four is female.

I stared at the photo of two gorgeous blastocysts, pleased as punch! He handed us the rest of the paperwork, the table of pairs of chromosomes and sex. All but one were normal, and the abnormal one, a boy, had multiple messed up chromosomes.

He left and the nurse, J, came back in and told me to undress from the waist down and to pull the blanket over me. Soon after, she re-entered with Dr. K, whom I hadn’t met before. I liked him immediately too! In fact, I liked him even better than Dr. H, with whom I had had the consultation. Dr. K was like a teddy bear, a very sweet-faced man with kind eyes, and I trusted him immediately.

I lay down with my feet in the stirrups, as instructed. DH was standing at my head, and we held hands. In went the speculum… The next thing you’ll feel is a cotton swab as I clean your cervix Nurse J hit a button on the intercom and told B in the lab that we were beginning. The dildocam revealed that my uterus still looked good. An image of a petrie dish with my name on it flashed up on the monitor in the corner of the room, and I was asked to confirm my name, and then that we were transferring two embryos, numbers three and four. I confirmed, wide-eyed and wide-mouthed, my grin only disappearing for a momentary grimace from the pinch of the catheter as it was threaded through my cervix.

B, we’re ready, J spoke into the intercom.

Be right there… B said.

At that, J crossed the room to turn off the lights.

Embryos like the dark, explained Dr. K. I cooed a little at that.

In came B with a long straw. I couldn’t see what Dr. K did, because I was lying down. But I watched the screen when Dr. K pointed out the catheter moving into my uterus. See that line moving from left to right? It was heading towards a predetermined spot indicated by a white arrow. There is deposit two white flecks, one larger than the other. I see them! I whispered excitedly. But Dr. K said what I was actually seeing was the fluid they were transferred in — they are still too small to be seen by the naked eye. I looked at the time: 12:19pm. The entire procedure took less than four minutes.

B returned to the lab to check that the embryo straw was empty. It was. So, lights back on, Dr. K withdrew the dildocam, catheter, and speculum. He said to push myself, feet still in stirrups, up the exam table and pulled out an extension for me to rest my feet on. And then he pulled up the blanket and sort of tucked me in! So sweet! He said it went well and reassuringly patted my belly a couple of times. I’m so glad he was my doctor, he was very kind.

Nurse J told us she’d return in 25 minutes, and to stay lying down. I played some relaxing hypnotic music (Shamanic Dream, by Anugama — binaural music that my acupuncturist plays) and took the opportunity to take more photos, this time of myself with a new happy ultrasound photo in my hand.

My first happy ultrasound.

May it be the first of many.